April 03, 2015

There Are Child Molesters In Your Neighborhood!

All parents want to protect their children from predators, but how do you keep your kids safe when you don’t know how to spot one? Anyone can be a child molester or a pedophile, so identifying one can be difficult – especially because most child molesters and pedophiles at first seem like normal people. Read on to learn which behaviors and traits are red flags, what situations to avoid, and how to deter child molesters from targeting your child.

Understand that any adult could be a child molester. There is no one physical characteristic, profession, or personality type that all child molesters share. Child molesters can be any sex or race, and their religious affiliations, occupations, and hobbies are as diverse as anyone else’s. A child molester may appear to be charming, loving, and completely good-natured while harboring predatory thoughts that he or she is adept at hiding. That means you should never dismiss the idea that someone could be a child molester out of hand.

Most abused children know their abuser. Thirty percent of children who have been sexually abused were abused by a family member, and 60 percent were abused by an adult they knew who was not a family member. That means only 10 percent of children who are sexually abused were targeted by a total stranger.

In most cases, a molester turns out to be someone the child knows through school or another activity, such as a neighbor, teacher, coach, member of the clergy, music instructor, or a babysitter. Family members like fathers, grandfathers, uncles, cousins, stepparents, and so on may also be sexual predators. Know the common characteristics of a child molester. While anyone can turn out to be a child molester, the majority of child molesters are men, regardless of whether their victims are male or female. Many sexual predators have a history of abuse in their past, either physical or sexual.

Some also have a mental illness, such as a mood or personality disorder. Heterosexual and homosexual men are equally likely to be child molesters. The idea that homosexual men are more likely to be child molesters is a complete myth. Female child molesters are more likely to abuse boys than girls. Look for signs of grooming. The term “grooming” refers to the process the child molester undertakes to gain a child’s trust, and sometimes the parents’ trust as well. Over the course of months or even years, a child molester will increasingly become a trusted friend of the family, offering to babysit, take the child shopping or on trips, or spend time with the child in other ways. Many child molesters won’t begin abusing a child until they gain their victim's trust. Some may use others opinions around them to back up their trustworthiness in order to take children shopping.

Child molesters look for children who are vulnerable to their tactics because they lack emotional support or aren’t getting enough attention at home or will try to convince the parents their children are safe with them and that they are not going far. The child molester will attempt to step in as the “parent” figure for the child.
Some child molesters prey on the children of single parents who aren’t available to provide as much supervision or convince parents that they are nice enough people to supervise without them.
A child molester will often use a range of games, tricks, activities and language to gain trust and deceive a child. These include: keeping of secrets (secrets are valuable to most kids, being seen as something “adult” and a source of power), sexually explicit games, fondling, kissing, touching, sexually suggestive behaviour, exposing a child to pornographic material, coercion, bribery, flattery, and—worst of all—affection and love. Be aware that these tactics are ultimately used to isolate and confuse your child.